"My story comes in two separate parts. The first one, was when I had recently moved up to the big city from my small home town. I didn't have a lot of friends so one of my coworkers suggested I try a site called MeetMe to find some new people to hang out with and maybe someone to date. That's where I met my first abuser. At first, he really turned on the charm, taking me out on expensive dates and buying me flowers. He was as sweet as could be, or so I thought. Over a years time, our relationship went from sunshine and young love, to a nightmare. He would degrade me, call me names, he would get drunk and lash out... pinning me to the wall or floor as he yelled at me and threatened me. What finally ended it was the day he really snapped. He had been caught cheating on me, and I found out which did not make him happy. As I grabbed all my things and threw them out onto the porch in my escape attempt he got more and more angry. As I grabbed my last bag and went to run out the door. He caught me by the arm. I stopped halfway out the door, as he then slammed me against the door frame... then repeatedly slammed my ankle and leg in the metal door fracturing the bones in my foot, and ankle badly. As I got in my car a wave of relief rushed over me, I was free. Now, Fast forward to 2015, when I began the relationship with my second abuser. He was a charmer, he came in the form of a good friend trying to console me through my depression and previous relationship issues. We became very close and ended up dating shortly after. The prince charming on the outside in no way matched the monster that lay dormant inside of him. I quickly found out he was an extreme narcissist who was also very heavily involved in Methamphetamine and Heroine. The drugs only amplified his rage and his paranoia. He isolated me entirely, I was not allowed to go to work, I was not allowed to go to the store, I was not allowed to be on social media, or text without his permission and constant monitoring. It got worse and worse. I had a gun held to my head, I was pushed down stairs, I had him get angry with me and slice up his arms and wrists and then attack me when I tried to help him, getting blood all over me. He did very disturbing things that even to this day, I have a hard time speaking about. Around thanksgiving... I found out I was pregnant. In Christmas of 2015 I miscarried. On New Years Day, January 1 2016 He finally snapped entirely. As we were parked in his truck at Target, out of nowhere he started yelling at me because of the baby. He then in the blink of an eye, was on top of me on the bench seat of that truck strangling me... I struggled, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't scream, I tried so hard to fight him off, he then hit me with his elbow in my mouth, then started strangling me again. When I was on the verge of losing consciousness, he let go and started driving away from the parking lot. I remember everything being foggy, I was dizzy, and nothing made much sense and I just laid curled up on the passenger side floor. He kept telling me, I can't let you go now, I can't now that it's gone this far. He pulled into a gas station to get himself a drink. I saw the opportunity and took it. When I knew he was inside the store, I jumped out of the truck and ran with all I had to a nearby restaurant, where I called my mom. I then managed to walk to my house, where I then attempted suicide, and thankfully failed. I ended up being admitted to the hospital. I sit here nearly 2 years later, and I am free, I am happy, and I am doing so well. I let him treat me like that because I thought I could fix him. But I couldn't you cannot fix a narcissist.
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